Sex takes on new meaning from Christian view

I know what you're thinking: "A Zach Vicars column about sex? Does he even know what sex is? Anything he'd have to say about it would be prude, detached and boring."

I beg to differ. I think the Christian viewpoint of sex is anything but boring. I hope, after you read this sex column, you'll agree.

First off, I need to dispel the myth that Christians are afraid of sex. This notion is nothing but a secular reaction to the abstinence movement. The Christian community does not shun or look down on sex. Rather, sex is celebrated as a gift from God. In the Bible, Solomon proclaimed: "Your breasts [are] like clusters of fruit ... I will climb the palm tree; I will take hold of its fruit." Clearly, intimacy isn't a topic the Bible avoids.

In the Church today, sex is not some taboo activity that should be separated from religion, as many believe. I once heard a respected pastor in my denomination say, "Sex is healthy. Have it early. Have it often. Have it inside marriage." But if biblical references and personal anecdotes aren't enough, consider the sociological data: My grandmother is one of 10 children, and I know of several families that boast a dozen children or more. You can't get numbers like that if you're afraid of sex.

Further, I'd like to make it clear that Christians are not only unafraid when it comes to sex, I'd say that Christians place more meaning and value in sex than the rest of the culture. We might even enjoy sex more, because we believe it is more than a casual connection, more than a tool for power and more than an empty pleasure. Christians understand sex as the highest expression of love, as the union of two bodies and two souls and as a holy act.

I'll use my own experience as an example. Before my wife and I even met, we both made commitments to ourselves, to God and to each other that we would "save sex" for marriage. We dated for almost five years, which tested our commitments. There were several moments when I wondered why we had made such promises in the first place. Then, during the summer, we exchanged rings, made vows to each other and spent our first night together. It was the most powerful, emotional and physical experience of my life. I am so thankful for the promises we made and for God's faithfulness to see us through. Waiting for sex might have been the most difficult thing the two of us have ever done, but it's also been the most rewarding. Our story is but one of thousands attesting to the incomparable bliss of committed, passionate, marital sex.

So you can see that Christians do not fear sex, we value it immensely. However, it would be a misrepresentation of the truth if I said the Christian community feels the same way about sex as everyone else. Christians do make distinctions. We do have boundaries on sexuality.

The first boundary is marriage. The old adage "sex should be kept in the confines of marriage" is useful here. Sex must be "confined" to one couple. Christian ethics forbid people from copulating with anyone who is not their spouse. In fact, Jesus says you shouldn't even think about it. There's no getting around it. This puts a boundary on sex. Just as fish should stay in water where it can grow, develop and play, so should sex stay in marriage.

Christian ethics also maintain that sex is meant to be shared between a man and a woman. There is no avoiding the fact that the Bible says homosexuality is not what God had in mind when he gave humans the gift of sex. In a post-modern world, many people find this viewpoint offensive and unacceptable. Others insist Christians only hold this belief because "the Bible tells me so." Although this religious formula is enough for many believers, I would suggest that God has given this commandment with good reason. The biblical witness exclusively supports sexual relations between a man and a woman because that is the only means of natural reproduction. Two men or two women simply cannot, on their own, create life. It is a biological impossibility. Further, God made men and women interdependent on one another, in both psyche and anatomy. In a way, each gender is incomplete - but sex is the completion.

I've done my best, in the last few hundred words, to lay out a Christian understanding of sex. There's a good chance in the process I've upset a few members of the Truman community, both Christian and non-Christian.

But, I hope you all will take this for what it is. It's not me sitting in an ivory tower claiming to have all the answers. In fact, I know I don't. You can reject what I'm saying. I just want you to know what you're rejecting. You're rejecting a sexual life without shame, guilt and heartache. You're rejecting a pleasurable and endless journey with one person. You're rejecting the unbelievable sex you were designed to have.

Zach Vicars is a sophomore philosophy/religion and linguistics major from St. Charles, Mo.